Why Am I Still Single?
Why Am I Still Single?
I picked my daughter up from her friend’s house last weekend and asked her whose truck was in the driveway. She said it was her friend’s mom’s boyfriend. I thought, “Wow, really?” I didn’t know her friend’s mom very well, but I did know that just a year ago she was married and last summer they separated. The fact that she moved on so quickly wasn’t a dig on her but more on me. It’s been several years since I’ve divorced, and I’m still single.
How do people find others so quickly?
How do I not?
The next day, walking my dog around the block, I walked by a house of a single mom of 4 boys. This mom has been relatively public about her husband leaving her & her boys just under a year ago. So, while walking, I was shocked to see a man with her. Again, no dig on her. Quite the opposite. I hate to admit it, but I was jealous. Not of that specific man because who knows about his back story, but how do people find others when I’m still alone?
Later that day, I was half-listening to a podcast that auto-played to the next episode. I usually would have skipped it as it didn’t relate to me, but I was zoning out. The conversation was to women that couldn’t get pregnant and the devastation they felt. Part of me kept listening because years ago, I was in this position, too, so I could relate. But as the conversation continued, I realized the truth they were speaking over these women was true for me also during this time. And maybe it’s true for you too.
We were never promised marriage. We were never promised children. We were never promised a successful career.
Our relationship status or motherhood status doesn’t define who we are. Our identity is found in Christ alone. We will never be complete in another person. Our hearts are made to long for something more, and that “more” cannot be found in another person, whether that’s a partner or child. We will only find our “more-ness” in God, the one who formed us. It so hard to lay down our dreams. But it’s the first step. Concentrating on the one who created us, the one who longs to fill us, instead of looking for love outside of us can bring us all the fulfillment we ever dreamed. Today, ask God to fill your heart with longing for him alone.